On family, coffee and doing it alone…

This is my family, they are 15, 12, 8 and 4.  Three girls, 1 boy.  All totally amazing and incredibly different in character.  They are my happiness, craziness, sanity, frustration and fun all wrapped up in a bundle of kind, caring, happy, lively loveliness. Being a single parent is hard.  Rewarding yes, but hard.  I didn’t choose to do this on my own.  Circumstances changed, I changed, life happened.  I think I do a pretty good job though (they do see their dad’s, a lot, and have a great relationship with them).  Most of the time being on my own doesn’t bother me – we’ve lived as a single parent family for over 3 years now.  It’s different now that I’m properly on my own though.  There’s no one to ring and moan, no one to give me hug on those rough days when I’m having to be the mean mum, no one to text and share those seemingly insignificant tiny triumphs with.  And that’s lonely. I’m slowly filling those gaps though – with work, crafts, home making, friends, and I plan to do more.   It’s not all doom and gloom, with these bundles of craziness around me – how could it be? So – this afternoon we took a trip to Beaulieu village.  We had a short walk along the river and popped into the new Mettricks for a drink.  I’d heard that Mettricks serve the best coffee in Southampton so it was time to try them out. I knew we were on to something good when my youngest asked for a babycino and was told that...

It’s been a while (and here’s why).

Nothing prepares you for losing someone you love.  No amount of time or forward planning can make it easier.  It hits you like a blunt instrument at the back of the neck, like sharp stabbing to your stomach, it’s as though your legs have been removed and replaced with immovable slabs on concrete.  Life continues to happen yet you look on as though you are a voyeur, not a participant.  The sun still rises every morning just as it always has but it feels different now. More intense somehow. My boyfriend had lung cancer and died unexpectedly a few weeks ago.  He’d been feeling better and was planning to play his cajon at Music in the City  (a free music festival in Southampton).  He’d been out for lunch, been driving his little red car with the roof down and had even had a beer in the sunshine.  He rang me at that afternoon, he sounded so well, we were looking forward to a weekend together.  That weekend didn’t happen the way we’d planned. Since then my life has been very different.  I’ve been concentrating on creating a new normal for myself and my children.  I’ve got a part time job for the first time in 5 years and I’m throwing my mixed up, crazy headed, distracted self into creating a happy, hygge home for my family. As for me, well, I’ve spent too much money, am eating too much and am not really facing up to what happened which is why I’m writing this. I hope this, along with the sewing I started today, will be a step towards...

Thoughts and dreams…lots of dreams…

I’ve neglected this website since it was opened last year, lots has happened – some great things, some good things and some that have really not been wonderful at all but that is life and without the heartache we wouldn’t sppreciate the happy things. Well, at least that’s how I am choosing to look at it!  Life as a the only adult at home is tricky at times, balancing family, friends, work, fun and quiet time for me is harder than it looks.  I often feel like a cat chasing my own tail.  Twenty years ago I was at university studying child psychology, sociology and anthropology.  I planned to become an educational psychologist and raise a family in a balanced home with two parents and a Tom and Barbara Good ethos of grow your own, make your own and *be happy with what you have.  Oh well! Shake Your Tush seems to be slowly building up, especially on Facebook. I have been getting lots of enquiries about alterations, finishing off projects that people have started but time hasn’t let them finish and most excitingly – wedding outfits!  This has been great fun and I can’t wait to show you the finished items after the big days of course :).  I’ve updated the shop on this site today – removed items that have sold via Facebook, reduced the price of some to reflect a recent sale I had and will be slowly be adding all my new stock. Tomorrow evening I will be launching my new ‘Bag of the Month’ club.  A subscription only club where a limited number of...

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